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​What Rude Birthday Card Would You Send The Queen This Weekend?

Posted by Potty Mouth on

It’s the Queen’s birthday this weekend so it’s time to decide what rude birthday card you would like to send her on her special day. Of course, you could always opt for a boring sensible card with flowers and butterflies on it, but where’s the fun in that? We’d rather she have a bit of a chuckle when opening one of the “happy anniversary of the day you popped out your mum's front bottom #happyfuckingbirthday”, “happy anniversary of the day your face rubbed against your mum's vagina #happyfuckingbirthday” rude birthday cards available on our website, in fact, maybe our “Happy Birthday Queen” rude birthday card would be better suited to the monarch.

Although if you were hoping to wish the Queen a happy 91st birthday this Saturday, then you would be a little late, as it’s not really the Queen’s birthday at all, and her real birthday was back in April. It’s tradition for monarchs to have two birthdays; a real birthday which is celebrated privately, and an official birthday where everyone can join in. So maybe you should send the Queen a “First Fucking Card I Saw” general greetings card instead, since it’s not even her real fucking birthday!

In fact, the Queen used to celebrate her official birthday on the second Thursday of June which was the same day as her father, King George VI, but this was then changed to the second Saturday in June in 1959, seven years after she became Queen. We’re pretty sure that they only changed the day to a Saturday so that more members of the public could enjoy it, and who are we to argue?

According to the website:

“Official celebrations to mark Sovereigns' birthday have often been held on a day other than the actual birthday, particularly when the actual birthday has not been in the summer. King Edward VII, for example, was born on 9 November, but his official birthday was marked throughout his reign in May or June when there was a greater likelihood of good weather for the Birthday Parade, also known as Trooping the Colour.”

Trooping the Colour is basically just a big parade for the Queen’s birthday featuring a colourful display of pageantry from 1400 officers and men, 200 horses and 400 musicians including the Queen’s personal troops from the Household Division.

So that explains it then: the whole birthday thing is based around trying to get a bit of sun for a nice garden party and trying to get as much out of people as possible. After all, two birthdays mean two sets of rude birthday cards and even better, two sets of presents!


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