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cardshit.com

Congratulations Cards, the Way to Tell People They're Not Complete Failures

Passing those exams, acing that driving test, getting that big promotion… there

are plenty of occasions that merit a hearty pat on the back in the form of congratulations cards

and a great big cheer of “Well done!” from everyone around! But be careful that the recipient

of your well wishes doesn’t get too far ahead of themselves and end up with a head

so big they can’t get through the door.

 

It’s nice to let someone know that they’ve done a good job every once in a while,

and sending congratulations cards is the ideal way to do that without having to

actually speak to them in person. It also saves you from getting too sentimental

and gushy and it means you don’t even have to hang around and hear all the

boring details about how great their new job is. Just pop the card in the post and

be done with it. Sending a card really is a win-win situation.

Cardshit.com specialises in congratulations cards that simultaneously say, “good

job” and “we’ve heard enough” at the same time. Take our simple but effective

“Congratufuckinglations” card, which effortlessly conveys everything it needs to

in only one (made-up) word. Also available for more specific occasions such as,

“Never thought you’d pass the theory test #congratufuckinglations” and “It’s a

baby! #congratufuckinglations”, this is a sentiment which applies to nearly every

situation you can think of.

 

Remember being a student; those long lost halcyon days of getting felt up on the

dance floor, microwave meals and sleeping in until midday? That might all sound

like a right laugh, but it’s a well known fact that it’s piss easy to doss about

drinking 20p shots and missing lectures, but the hard part of any student’s life is

managing to actually pass those all important exams (just joking, who even looks

at your A Level results anyway?). So try sending the apathetic student in your

life a “Clever Cunt” congratulations card and it’ll be popping up on their

Instagram feeds and Snap Chat stories in no time.

 

Sending your mate a congratulations card is also a superb way to remind them

that although they may deserve a bit of recognition, the hard work isn’t quite

over yet, and to be honest there’s probably plenty more to come. A

“Congratulations! Don’t fuck it up” card is the perfect tool to convey both your

well wishes and an important warning not to get too big of an ego or too

complacent in the future. If you think about it, you’re actually doing your mates

a favour, a humorous congratulations card helps to keep them humble.

Congratulations can come in all shapes and sizes, and sometimes it’s nice to just

mark a special occasion by sending a congratulations card that really hits the

mark. For example, sending someone close to you a card that reads,

“Congratulations on the move! Hope your neighbours aren’t cunts.” Just imagine

that sitting on the mantelpiece of their new home…

 

Whether they view it as a memento of an important occasion and keep your card

forever, or they simply toss your card in the rubbish as soon as you’re out of

sight, it’s the thought that counts, and it doesn’t get more selfless than

congratulating a friend or family member for something memorable that they

have done, but that you really couldn’t give a flying fuck about.

 

So next time your pal comes in to work boasting about their upcoming move,

new baby or even the fact that they finally managed to go to the gym this week,

consider a Cardshit.com congratulations card to really put some pep in their step

and let them know just how proud you are!

Of course if they did fuck it up after all, then the sorry cards might be a better choice "sorry

you fucked up" being sure to hit the mark.